Confucius say, sex is like the army, the closer you are to discharge, the better you feel..............

In the 1400s a law was set forth in England that a man was allowed to beat his wife with a stick no thicker than his thumb. Hence we have 'the rule of thumb'
I think we'd need a rule of thigh these days..............................

Many years ago in Scotland, a new game was invented. It was ruled 'Gentlemen Only...Ladies Forbidden'...and thus the word GOLF entered into the English language.

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV were Fred and Wilma Flintstone

Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the U. S. Treasury.
That's sort of the same thing these days.............................

It is impossible to lick your elbow.

The percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%
The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%

Q. What do bulletproof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers, and laser printers all have in common?
A. All were invented by women.
Clever girls............................

Many years ago in England , pub frequenters had a whistle baked into the rim, or handle, of their ceramic cups. When they needed a refill, they used the whistle to get some service. 'Wet your whistle' is the phrase inspired by this practise

At least 75% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow!

You know you did...........................................