If you want pretty nurse, you got to be patient ........
Right, enough memeing, I have a rant....
My mum, who's 73, has just gone into hospital for a hip replacement. Before she went, she was visited by an "OT" to assess her needs when she comes out.
Because she will be largely immobile and unable to lift, cook, clean, shop, walk properly,change the necessary surgical stockings, or wash herself, they decided she'd need some help. Good, you might think..........
But, and it's big but, so BUT, that doesn't mean she'll be getting actual people to help her. don't be bloody daft!
Her aftercare consists of:-
a commode
an upright chair for the lounge
and a long stick with a sort of grabby thing on the end, so she can pick things up without bending over!
Not bad eh? BUT, there's more.....
Then they realised that because she won't be able to bend or lift -
she won't be able to empty the lovely commode!
The answer?
A trolley to wheel the piss pot to the toilet!
Hurray! Problems solved!
apart that is, from the cooking, the cleaning, the washing herself, the changing her necessary surgical stocking..and the having a life and some dignity in general!
In a nutshell, the aftercare for my mum consists of -
a pisspot and a trolley to push the pisspot around in!
She's "lucky" enough to have me and some friends and family around to help (and I have to own up here and say we didn't tell the NHS that she had any available support, in fact they were told she didn't!)......
Which poses the question....how do other people in this situation cope ?!!!
11 comments:
Hi Confucious,
So sorry to read this post. I'll keep your mum in my prayers. I know what you meant about everything including and especially at the end of the day, her dignity.
Perhaps for your mum's sense of well-being too, she could turn to some old passions and loves like music, books, maybe radio plays...an opera...I don't know. There is so much healing in the Arts.
When I was in London, I had a few friends who experienced what you did and one who confided in me in particular. Happened with her dad.
But her family rounded up...even a temperamental sister and her own children who were close to their grandad tooks turns to help out.
I observed that the thought of having to do chores or errands were cheerfully met - this after having accepted what hospitals were and their seemingly lack of care or good responses or even scheduling appointments that took forever. It was love for the family member that won the day. Love kept the wheels turning. A family love that was incapable of measure or logic. And then there was peace.
But I do remember the swift anger at the hospitals. I do still remember how angry my friend was with the hospital's attitude to things and that went on inside her, for a long time.
Thank you for your kind words Susan, don't worry she'll be well cared for by us all....I just couldn't believe the lack of care from the professionals
I hope your Mum's ok. The NHS have been fairly rubbish with my Grandfather sd well, who has Parkinsons and is rapidly stiffening up. I think at some point it becomes necessary to have a full time (or nearly full time) helper, and the NHS just can't offer that, so they offer useless items instead.
Thank you cheesemonger(is that right?).
Sorry to hear about your grandfather....guess we've all got a similar story to tell, doesn't make it right though.......
One has to wonder what happened to the concept of the hippocratic oath. Or has it just become the hypocritic oath... It's a sad indictment of any society - and sadly one sees it the world over. It's like all the care and respect has just flooded out of the world. Thank goodness your mum has you.
Thank you Mish Hennypenny,
But there are many of us around, too many to count...........so hopefully the care and respect is just flooding out of the systems and not the people........
Hey man! I'll pray for your mum's quick recovery. Reading what she's been through, I could feel the pain she might have. It must have been agonizing. Thank God she got good kids! They're always there for her!
The real problem is the lack of funding/resources in the NHS. Utterly unacceptable! The question you pose is one I've also struggled with in posts re my dad ...
Hope she makes a speedy recovery.
I think that everyone reading your post can see how wrong this is. I can't say it surprises me though, I have heard a lot of stories - from regular folk - that are similar. Some even worse.
'how do other people in this situation cope ?!!!' I'm guessing not very well. The thing is, the people who are supposed to be running this country don't seem to care. It stinks.
Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts......
I guess it's too big a problem for mere mortals like us ..........unfortunately we seem to be straying further and further away from a social conscience........oh for someone to vote for!
You said it, hon!
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